Statistics on Nightline Face-Off: Why Can’t a Successful Black Woman Find a Man indicated that 42% percent of U.S. black women have never been married and that there are more black women than black men. Additionally, according to the segment, black women are more likely than black men to go to college and excel in corporate America. In the process of becoming successful, many black women put off dating or having families until their thirties, at which point they find it difficult to find a suitable mate of equal status who is ready to commit to one woman. And those who fit the bill are often exclusively attracted to women of another race, gay or unwilling to settle down. This is compounded by the idea that black women should remain single rather than date outside of their race
Because of the statistics listed above, and many other factors, there is a large population of successful, unmarried black women.
Slim Thug helped explained the black male shortage in a Vibe.com article (June 7, 2010). He stated that black men often fair better with white women who are supportive and less bossy. He added that both black men and women need to change their ways of thinking about relationships. Many black women want black men to be good providers; however, they do not want to reciprocate by playing a domestic role (Vibe, 2010).
“Most single Black women feel like they don’t want to settle for less. Their standards are too high right now. They have to understand that successful Black men are kind of extinct. We’re important. It’s hard to find us so Black women have to bow down and let it be known that they gotta start working hard; they gotta start cooking and being down for they man more. They can’t just be running around with their head up in the air and passing all of us.”
Slim Thug’s comment illustrates the power struggle often faced between Black men and women. I believe both genders need to change their views about each other for the sake of a healthier community. However, in popular culture there very few examples of how to go about doing this.
Positive images of relationships between a black man and a black woman are hard to find in mass media, i.e. movies and television shows. Black men are often paired with Hispanic, white or mixed-race women (e.g., Hitch, Flight, Snow Dogs and Save the Last Dance).
Positive messages must discuss the importance of a 50-50 partnership in which each person contributes equally and is faithful. For instance, music lyrics, television shows and movies can help improve relationships by including discussions of how black men and women can work together for the betterment of the community.
At any rate, the beef between black men and women must be squashed.
- Black Men Vs. Black Women: Can We Squash The Beef? (madamenoire.com)
- Five Mindsets That Hinder Black Women From Relationship Success (straightforwardtalk.net)
- Racism, Sexism, Identity, Oh My! (redsociology.com)
- Black Men & Black Women (awkwaardbeauty.wordpress.com)
- Relationships: Black Women & Black Men — Why The Dichotomy? (mrwright212.wordpress.com)
- NPR Study Finds That Black Men Want Love, Too (colorlines.com)
- Is It A Surprise That Single Black Men Are Looking For LTR? (npr.org)
- Do More Black Men Desire Commitment And Long-term Relationships Than Black Women? New Study Says Yes (madamenoire.com)